To Sum it Up...

... I threw a toaster. And Mike threw a pump. Two separate incidents; each appliance malfunctioning in its own extremely inconvenient way. And all this before 8 AM.

Let me back up...

Our basement is under water. Again. That beautiful Pergo floor is warped and buckling. And it just keeps raining. I'd love to stay home and vacuum up water again (well, not really) but I'm working until 9:00 tonight. As Mike tried taking apart and repairing our defective pump, Ellie rolled around on the floor sobbing about a hangnail. And Owen announced that he didn't want to go to daycare. And both kids refused to get dressed when I asked them to. And then the broken pump started leaking oil all over my kitchen counter top and floor. And all I wanted was an English muffin. With peanut butter. But when I pressed down that little lever on our ridiculously cheap toaster, nothing. I pressed again. Nothing. I rattled the thing, and shook it a bit. Nada. So I yanked the cord out of the socket (kids, do as I say, not as I do) and I tossed it.

Sadly, it made me feel better. (Much better than one of those crying sessions that you have without real tears, for fear of smearing your make-up right before work.) And even made that dumb toaster start working again. I should feel guilty, but honestly, I think every parent is entitled to throw a household appliance once a year. Hell, maybe even twice.

I told you it was a rough morning.

Monkey See, Monkey Do

Boys will be boys:













And boys will be girls:

Observations

• I never thought I'd let my kids eat Froot Loops. Or eat in front of the TV. Right now they're eating Froot Loops in front of the TV. (Turns out, if a manufacturer puts the word "fiber", "protein" and/or "whole grain" on a box, I will buy it).

• Mike was Mr. Mom the other night when I had to work late. He did well, aside from letting Owen's backpack catch on fire. (Child puts backpack down on counter; parent lights gas stove to make dinner; backpack begins to smoke).

• Yesterday at Target I noticed a bottle of Coke Classic with a "new item" sticker on it. That didn't make much sense to me.

• Last night, Ellie asked for a protein bar for dessert. I was so proud, until I realized she meant "Klondike Bar".

• After several days away from the gym, I logged seven miles on the treadmill the other day. Feeling proud, I said to Owen later, "guess how many miles I ran on the treadmill today?" He said, "I don't know... sixty?" I didn't feel proud anymore.

• Owen used to be able to identify all the trains on "Thomas"; now he talks about black diamonds and "pow pow" (as in "really, really fluffy snow").

• While scrolling through the TV guide the other night, I noticed "The Real World XXIII" on MTV. Am I really that old, or do I just not know my Roman numerals???